Omer Neutra’s absence hangs on a canine tag round his father’s neck, declaring in Hebrew that his coronary heart is held captive in Gaza. It’s displayed in his face emblazoned on his dad’s T-shirt and within the images taped to empty chairs at vacation tables.
His absence drives his mom’s every day interior talks along with her lacking son, and her plans for a brand new house to be ready for him to rebuild his life. It glints within the candles his dad and mom lit and watched burn right down to the chocolate icing on his 22nd birthday.
For three months, it has fueled Ronen and Orna Neutra’s all-consuming mission to free their son, who grew up on Long Island, New York, and deferred faculty to spend a yr in Israel, main him into the Israeli military and, on Oct. 7, to his obvious seize by Hamas.
Now, because the captivity of the more than 130 remaining hostages hits the three-month mark, the couple says their son is running out of time amid stymied negotiations and risks to the hostages that develop with every passing week.
“It’s very scary. And it’s frustrating,” mentioned his mom, Orna Neutra.
Prospects for a negotiated deal that would return the hostages in change for Palestinian prisoners stay caught between Hamas’ calls for for a full cease-fire and Israel’s intention to get rid of the group from Gaza, consultants mentioned.
Egypt has proposed a multistep peace proposal that included exchanges and an final finish to the battle. But occasions such because the current killing of a high Hamas chief in Beirut have sophisticated talks. The Neutras are actually amongst these urgent for a deal for each hostage without delay, reasonably than restricted exchanges, as quickly as doable.
“We can’t wait for the total dismantling of Hamas to gain their release. We can’t wait for the end of the war,” Ronen Neutra mentioned.
Meanwhile, the couple stays in painful limbo. Since they had been instructed by the Israeli authorities that Omer was taken hostage they’ve gotten no phrase. They don’t know the place he is, or even when he’s alive.
They imagine he’s doubtless being held within the warren of tunnels beneath Gaza, the place some freed hostages have reported a extreme lack of meals and medical care, bodily and psychological abuse and ongoing risks from Israeli bombing.
For now, all they’ll do is proceed their relentless work of the previous three months, shuttling between Washington and Tel Aviv to foyer lawmakers, attending vigils and marches and publicizing the plight of their son and different hostages.
“He’s our son. We can’t think about not getting him back. It’s not an option,” Ronen mentioned.
Shock and a life turned the other way up
On Oct. 7, Orna and Ronen had been about to go to mattress at dwelling close to Plainview, New York, after they determined to examine the information.
They knew Omer, who was serving in an Israeli military armored unit, was stationed close to the kibbutz farming communities alongside the Gaza border.
There had been some clashes in current weeks. In current conversations, he’d instructed his mom by telephone that issues appeared to have calmed. Now, nevertheless, reporters steered a significant escalation. Ronen texted his son.
“Hey Omer, what’s going on?”
Their son’s presence within the Israeli military was rooted within the family’s connection to Israel.
Orna was born within the U.S. and Ronen in Israel, however each had been twin residents with family in each nations. Omer was born in Manhattan, a month after the Sept. 11 terrorist assaults.
He grew up on Long Island taking part in basketball, soccer and volleyball and attended Schechter School of Long Island, a Jewish day college. He was an outgoing, generally goofy, charismatic individual, his dad and mom mentioned, typically a sports activities captain and lively in United Synagogue Youth. He liked hip-hop, fantasy soccer and the New York Knicks.
Family images present a clean-cut Omer grinning together with his dad and mom and youthful brother Daniel at a Knicks recreation and exhibiting off a shirt from the State University of New York at Binghamton, the place he’d been accepted to school.
But at 18, he deferred admission to Binghamton for a spot yr in Israel, to take part in a service and schooling program that, for Israeli residents, serves as a prelude to obligatory army service.
Omer instructed his dad and mom it appeared unfair his mates needed to serve within the Israeli military and he didn’t. There had been risks, and it wasn’t a simple choice. But he determined to hitch below a program for individuals from different nations.
Ronen mentioned they had been happy with his sense of obligation however mentioned goodbye with a “heavy heart.” He later joined a tank unit.
But on Oct. 7, because the hours glided by and Ronen’s WhatsApp confirmed the normally responsive son wasn’t seeing messages, they started to concern that one thing horrible had occurred. They scrambled for info.
“We didn’t sleep the whole night. We just called anybody we know,” Ronen mentioned.
Two days later, after the complete horror of the assault emerged, the couple noticed two males in darkish fits from the Israeli Embassy coming to the door of their Plainview-area dwelling.
“It was chilling,” Ronen mentioned.
Eventually, they discovered that Omer’s unit was attacked and that he and others had been taken into Gaza, he mentioned just lately, addressing a group in Israel.
The couple swung into motion. They referred to as lawmakers and authorities officers. They related with different hostage households who would kind the Hostages and Missing Families Forum, offering info, help and advocacy.
Soon they had been attending a rally in Times Square and becoming a member of President Joe Biden on Zoom, the place they instructed tales about son. They gave rounds of media interviews, sharing wrenching particulars together with lighting a birthday cake for a son who wasn’t there to blow out the candles.
Fast-moving occasions put their hopes and fears on a curler coaster. In late October, they confronted recent fears for his security when Israel launched its floor invasion.
“Our lives turned completely upside down,” Orna mentioned.
Hope and a brand new mission
They couple saved in contact with U.S. and Israeli officers commonly, however for more than a month there was no phrase on their son’s whereabouts or situation.
They might solely guess whether or not the punishing Israeli airstrikes and motion of troops into Gaza within the early weeks of November landed close to him.
“The uncertainty and not having any information is really difficult,” Ronen mentioned.
Then, the week after Orna joined 1000’s who gathered at a Nov. 14 Israeli solidarity rally on the National Mall in Washington, they obtained encouraging information.
Furious negotiations brokered by the United States, Egypt and Qatar had produced a plan to change some hostages for Palestinian prisoners. The pause would additionally enable more humanitarian help for civilians struggling starvation and displacement.
They tempered their hopes. Experts mentioned troopers had been prone to be these held the longest.
“We knew that it’s mostly kids and women, and we respect that,” Ronen mentioned. “But, of course, we wanted to see Omer among them.”
Around Thanksgiving, the couple traveled to Israel, the place emotional scenes had been taking part in out as captives returned on Red Cross vans to their households. In these exchanges, two Americans, together with 4-year-old Abigail Edan, had been freed.
In all, more than 100 hostages had been exchanged for 240 Palestinian prisoners, largely ladies and kids on either side, earlier than the deal collapsed and fight resumed, one other blow to hostage households.
Returnees who spoke about their situations, some citing a scarcity of medical care or being held at gunpoint and continually fearing dying, solely added to the Neutras’ worries.
Back dwelling on Long Island, group and mates rallied round them, holding occasions, offering meals and serving to hold Omer’s story on social media and within the information. One of Omer’s mates was maintaining his fantasy soccer group, Orna mentioned. And their story was touching the general public, together with a girl who commented on a Times of Israel story after listening to Orna talk about her son.
“I had to lean on the kitchen countertop for support listening to you and the pain you’re experiencing,” she wrote. “My own son turns 22 in a couple weeks.”
Omer additionally appeared among the many #KidnappedFromIsrael flyers, created by Israeli artists, that had been plastered on partitions round New York and cities throughout the globe to attract consideration to their plight. The couple was dismayed when some had been torn down amid widening protests over Israel’s response by individuals supporting Palestinian rights.
Ronen mentioned he sympathized with the Palestinian individuals in Gaza – they, too, had been taken hostage by Hamas. But they labored exhausting to keep away from politics. This was about their son, and so they centered on points corresponding to drawing consideration to the truth that Hamas wouldn’t let the Red Cross go to to examine on the hostages.
They desperately needed phrase. Neutra’s brother, Daniel, delivered a message to Omer in a single interview saying: “Just stay strong and know that we’re doing all we can.”
His mom had her personal means.
“I speak to him every day in my mind,” Orna mentioned. “We try to keep the hope.”
Calls for a hostage deal develop more pressing
On a December day in Washington, the couple walked right into a somber Hanukkah occasion on the Israeli Embassy. Outside, a number of protestors waved Palestinian flags, in keeping with one report. Inside, a wall confirmed images of Omer and different hostages.
“We pray for a Hanukkah miracle that will bring Omer back to us, together with the remaining hostages,” Orna mentioned. “We pray that the light we spread is stronger and more powerful than the evil and darkness overshadowing right now.”
A day later, they had been amongst 13 hostage households on the White House to satisfy with Biden, who they mentioned underscored the U.S. dedication to carry the hostages dwelling.
About six Americans, together with Omer, are believed to be among the many hostages. One American girl stays unaccounted for. Four American hostages have been launched by Hamas, together with two throughout a weeklong cease-fire final month.
He’s additionally one in every of an unclear quantity with Israeli army ties, a connection that would complicate their release.
On Dec. 15, the hazards to the hostages held in a battle zone had been highlighted when three Israeli troopers who had escaped their captors had been mistakenly killed by Israeli troops, fueling more tensions with hostage households.
By Christmas, the couple took their pleas again to Israel to foyer lawmakers there whereas the U.S. Congress was on break. Hostage households had been placing continued stress on Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s authorities to do no matter it took to carry them dwelling, holding common demonstrations, speeches and rallies in Israel.
“Their situation is only becoming more dangerous, and more life-threatening with every day that passes,” mentioned Jonathan Dekel-Chen, whose 35-year-old Israeli American son, Sagui, was taken from Kibbutz Nir Oz.
Israel had just lately proposed a weeklong truce to return more ladies and kids, however Hamas had rejected it, demanding as an alternative that Israel fully finish its offensive earlier than any additional negotiations, in keeping with news reports.
Most hostage households say any deal that will get the hostages dwelling is price the fee, although a small quantity disagree, mentioned Gershon Baskin, Middle East director for peace-building group International Communities Organization, who helped negotiate the 2011 change of an Israeli soldier for more than 1,000 Palestinian prisoners.
“There’s no victory for Israel in this war if the hostages don’t come home,” Baskin mentioned.
In more personal moments, outdoors of their busy schedule of public appearances, Ronen and Orna spoke with a few of Omer’s Israeli mates. They discovered that one evening earlier than the assault, he watched the sundown with a good friend and contemplated life after his service.
Because their son would by now have been searching for a brand new house, his dad and mom are doing that in his place – hoping to discover a good new place and fill it together with his belongings, the place he can land and rebuild his life whereas therapeutic from no matter scars he may carry dwelling.
“It gives us again another task on our to-do list, to stay positive and productive, and just create the future that we want to have,” Ronen mentioned. “We are acting and working with the full belief that he’s alive.”
